Website review: How To Give a Cat a Pill
AllenHarkleroad discovered this in Cats
•22 reviews since Mar 27, 2008
cats, humor, joke
•flickabooger.com/archive/2008/03/27/how-to-gi...
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Reviews of this website
AllenHarkleroad discovered 4 months ago- This made me laugh so hard I almost peed on myself
- stellarcreature rated 2 months ago
- sooo true. cats are impossible when it comes to giving them medicine. From the page: "8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw."
- Tapola rated 4 months ago
- This comes in handy when you need to give cat a pill. For more advanced people: How to give a cat liquid medicine?
- shaniatwo rated 4 months ago
- Along with everyone else, I thought this was very very funny..I also, have tried to do this, not always successfully...
- GalerieDeBeaute rated 4 months ago
- lol...This is just too funny....I too damn near piddled myself just imagining all this and picturing myself in the role of the retriever!!!!
- Kingjellybean rated 4 months ago
- Quality. I honestly thought it was going to be serious after I read the first lines. Wrong.
- RickWolff rated 4 months ago
- Well, first off, when you refer this URL to someone and they see that it comes from that authoritative source, that FlickABooger.com ... I mean, I'm just saying... That's how you know it's "snot" being too serious. (Sorry.)
- xOutlawStarx rated 4 months ago
- Too funny for words, but read it anyways...
- longshotalpha rated 4 months ago
- Cute
- Silverfox616 rated 4 months ago
- Hilarious!!
From the page: "How To Give a Cat a Pill 1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. 2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. 4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. 5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. 6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously. 7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from heart and set to one side for gluing later. 8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw. 9) Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap. 10) Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band. 11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss-back another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom. 12) Ring fire brigade to retrieve the f------ cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. 13) Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down. 14) Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table. 15) Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters." - Hilarious!!
