Last login: 2 days agoBatsceba is a 28 year old woman in a relationship from Berlin, Italy.
I've stopped thinking. and i'm dumb waiting for the Great Mystery hug. I've been looking for it wandering about the streets in a city that doesn't belong to me, I've been looking for it letting water drop on me to shut my pain up. yet i've just met the other's rage and i've been annihilated. like i was annihilated as a child before someone raising their voice, a slap in the face i didn't understand. i'm not cut out for life. i don't have nails. i always expect understanding, explanations, love. but i can't change. and i'll keep on roaming with my disability to live, listening to the distant echo of the Great Mystery which will ease my pain. i don't know how to live but i know how to love. and i'll keep on walking trying not to to tread on the ant crossing my path.
peace and love
» edit
It's snowin', my brain is kind of frozen. I think back to the hostile depression. I've experienced it, lately. Hostility doens't allow you to understand, it just fills you up with prejudices, and when someone you didn't expect to turns hostile, then you find yourself longing for cuddling, because the unfair accuses make you feel even more fragile. When you find yourself ending a relationship, a friendship, whatever, why do you end it with hostility? As if other had now become your enemy. The world is divided in two kind of people: the executioners and the victims. Yet the difference is hard to understand, even if i don't agree with those who state the victims somehow often end up cooperating with their own executioners. Anyway i know i was born a victim, helpless and exposed.
Anyway, that doesn't mean that I'm not able to go on believing, fighting, flying. In fact, as the phoenix each time I'm hurt I burn, exhaling the sweetest smell, and three days later I get reborn from my ashes.
I've decided that it's time to think of what Present can offer to us. I'm not talking of the kind of Present which may be summed up in these words "let's grab everything now for tomorrow may not come". No, that's a trivial Present I won't even bother considering.
I'm speaking of the fact that I'm tired of hearing politicians, doctors, scientists, grandparents praise the wonders Future has in store for us or talk about our past glories. We have to start and focus on a positive present, on what we can do NOW, and just do it.
From now on it'll be just a neverending Present to me. No more "we will live, we will do, we will win" or "We've lived, we've done, we've won". NO: Let's live, let's do, let's win!
One Love...
The windscreen wiper was going up and down to the rhythm of the song and the gliding water was singing along with Bono:
One love...
She smiled.
WALK ON
I've stopped thinking. and i'm dumb waiting for the Great Mystery hug. I've been looking for it wandering about the streets in a city that doesn't belong to me, I've been looking for it letting water drop on me to shut my pain up. yet i've just met the other's rage and i've been annihilated. like i was annihilated as a child before someone raising their voice, a slap in the face i didn't understand. i'm not cut out for life. i don't have nails. i always expect understanding, explanations, love. but i can't change. and i'll keep on roaming with my disability to live, listening to the distant echo of the Great Mystery which will ease my pain. i don't know how to live but i know how to love. and i'll keep on walking trying not to to tread on the ant crossing my path.
I like them
Jan 28, 8:00am
Meet another member
