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Mick-45

Last seen: 3 hours ago

Mick is a 50 year old guy from Birmingham, England, UK

Information is not knowledge Knowledge is not wisdom Wisdom is not truth Truth is not beauty Beauty is not love Love is not music Music is THE BEST. Frank Zappa

  • Created Oct 14 •

    My girlfriend pulled up a chair earlier and said, "We need to talk about our future."

    I said, "Yeah, it's gonna be fucking mental - we'll have flying cars, shiny silver suits, holidays on the moon!"

    I'm now single.

  • Created Sep 30 •

    I've just invented an invisibility cloak; anything under it is rendered completely invisible.

    I'm still working out the kinks; you can still see the cloak itself.

  • Created Sep 26 •

    Osama calls all of his cronies to his cave one day for a security brief.

    "We've been told by intelligence that there are a number of SAS trying to infiltrate our holy organisation," Osama shouts out, "So we are upping the security patrols! Mustafa, Ali, Imran and Dave, you take the first patrol!"

  • Created Sep 26 •

    I was thinking of starting up a small zoo, so I wrote a letter to London Zoo,

    "Dear Sir, I'm starting up a zoo, please send me 2 mongooses"

    I thought that didn't sound right so I tried again,

    "Dear Sir, I'm starting up a small zoo, please send me 2 mongeese"

    Nope, that still didn't sound right,

    "Dear Sir, Im starting up a small zoo, please send me 2 mongi"

    Ahh fuck it I thought,

    "Dear Sir, Im starting up a small zoo, please send me a mongoose.

    P.S. Send me another one"

  • Created Sep 18 •

    I'm going everywhere in a giant hamster ball.

    That's how I roll.

  • Dailymotion - Sensational Alex Harvey Band - give my...

    Rated Aug 04 • 1 review • music, video • dailymotion.com

    Give My Compliments To the Chef.

    The Old Grey Whistle Test with Bob Harris the best ever music show (if your 50ish).

  • Created Jul 18 •

    The other day I bought myself some sensible walking boots and a little rucksack, and I went up to the lake district. I walked for about five miles then I stopped and sat on a stone wall and had a flask of coffee. Then I walked another five miles and stopped and had another flask........fucking hell, I'm rambling.

  • Created Jun 20 •

    went on holiday to Sweden and visited the Sauna. Anyway, I wasn't expecting this but it was actually a mixed sauna - males and females - so it was full of all these nice blonde Swedish girls. Being British, I didn't know how to react except sit there for a while and then leave politely. Looking back, that was the most embarassing 19 hours of my life.

  • Created Apr 22 2009 •

    went for an interview yesterday for a job as a Blacksmith they asked if i had any experience shoeing horses! I replied yes i once told a donkey to fuck off!

  • Created Apr 15 2009 •

    Confucius proclaimed....

    "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started"

    So before I came into work this evening I looked around my house to see things I'd started and hadn't finished;

    So I finished off a bottle of wine, a bottle of Baileys, a butle of Rum, a bolol of Vodda, a pockt of biscts, the mainder of bot Prozac, the res of the Chesescke an a bax a cholates..

    Yu haf no idr who gud I fel.