If you are so devoid of understanding of the human condition and need this lame pseudo-scientific horoscope-like nonsense then you shouldn't be a writer.
INTP - The Thinker or Architect
Characteristics: Reserved, creative, intellectual, adaptable, very logical
Good occupations: Mediators, musicians, strategic planners
Acronym: It's Not Theoretically Possible
Half empty or half full? "The glass is full -half water, half air!"
Motto: "I'm brilliant and you should bow to my genius"
ISTJ - The Duty Fulfiller or Detective
Characteristics: Quiet, cautious, meticulous, responsible, strong and silent type
Good occupations: Administrators, inspectors, researchers
Acronym: I Save Things Judiciously
Half empty or half full? "It's half empty now and it wouldn't surprise me if it dried up completely."
Motto: "I do everything right"
Yep. Sounds like me.